It seems to be an epidemic. National headlines prove we have a problem with it. Riots prove it. Rants on Facebook prove it.What is "it"?
We rush to judgment before we have the facts.
We paint groups of people with broad brush-strokes. We assume all Democrats are a certain way. We assume all Republicans are a certain way. We make broad judgments about Christians, Catholics, Jews, Muslims, and atheists.We judge motives before we even have a chance to get the facts:
- Visitors at church are ignored because they are not dressed like us. We assume the worst about them, or we simply don't take the time to talk to them.
- Moms are bullied because they choose to breast-feed or formula-feed.
- Black-Friday shoppers are vilified for greed and hypocrisy because they shop the day after Thanksgiving.
What if we actually took time to find out the facts behind the actions?
What if we paused before we ascribe evil motives to others?
- We might discover that the visitor just lost everything and they are wearing their best...and that they are so terrified they are considering never returning again.
- We might find out breast-feeding moms are doing what they think is best...or that some formula-feeding moms have shed many tears over their inability to breast-feed...or that others simply cannot earn a living and breast-feed. (And it's none of our business!)
- We might find out that many Black-Friday shoppers are just trying to clothe their families by taking advantage of the deep discounts.
If we refrain from rushed judgments, we would spare the teacher the agony of vilification. We would spare moms the humiliation of mockery. We would spend our energy minding our own business, rather than focusing on how others spend the day after Thanksgiving.
Timing is the key. Find out the facts BEFORE you act. Save your energy. Save your relationships.
"...Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God." --James 1:19-20
Let's look at some antidotes to lightning-quick judgement.
Get the facts before you get angry.
"If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his shame and folly." --Proverbs 18:13
"Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly." --Proverbs 14:29
Remember your own flaws before you criticize.
"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom." --Proverbs 11:2
Keep your mouth shut.
"Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent." --Proverbs 11:12
If you still think the other person is wrong, stay out of it as much as possible.
"It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling." --Proverbs 20:3I am not saying that we must turn a blind eye to injustice. Some wrongs truly NEED to be addressed in in love. Just don't jump on the outrage-bandwagon for entertainment. All confrontation must be done in love and after many prayers for wisdom and guidance.
We are called "Christians". Let us model Christ-like behavior by reacting in love, not self-righteous condemnation.
And please be nice to the Black Friday shoppers. We are excited about replacing our worn-out jeans for $10 a pair!
All Scripture quotations are from the English Standard Version.
3 comments:
Well said. Now if we can just remember it in the heat of the moment we will please our Father greatly. (Which is why we need to hide God's word in our hearts, "that I might not sin against Thee."Ps. 119:11
Agreed - I'm always reminding myself to get the log out of my own eye first!
Yeah, it's much harder to apply than it is to write about!! I know I certainly need God's grace to help me slow down.
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